Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Taxes? I Don't Owe No Stinkin' Taxes


If it's not one thing, it's another with Diego Maradona. He can't manage to stay out of trouble. He's either got a Tony Montana-sized coke habit, hepatitis or he's growing as fat as he is tall. Now he's in tax trouble with the Italian authorities. Of course that means he has nothing to worry about since no one pays taxes over there.

The Italian Tax Association claims that Maradona owes almost $48 million dollars in back taxes from 17 years ago when he played for Napoli in Serie A. $29.8 million of that is interest.
"The Italian tax office has not managed to obtain from Maradona more than 0.11 per cent of what he owes the public treasury (which is) 36 million euros. It's deflating," he said.
What the hell is the Italian Tax Association? Is it similar to the Benevolent Gentleman's Club? I think we all know what I'm referring to when I speak of such groups. Is it an actual government agency or is it merely an "interested" party?

Maradona has only paid back about $56,000 and two "luxury watches" according to the association. Since when can you pay your taxes with goods? I would expect that in the Central African Republic or Tajikistan. That's a bit much even for Italy. If that's allowed, I'm moving my business there yesterday. I'm going to owe a shitload this coming year after making all kinds of bank selling ivory to the Chinese and $1,000,000 "endangered turduckens" to Russian and Middle Eastern billionaires. Why are they called endangered and what makes them so special? It's a snow owl stuffed into a bald eagle which is then stuffed into a condor. Mmm sacrilicious.

2 comments:

Spankey42 said...

"endangered turduckens", Brilliant!

JD said...

Best thing ever...the two luxury watches. Apparently, he tried to slink in to Italy when he was in Europe for the WC in '06, for some reason he was wearing two Rolexes when he went through customs. Who knows why? Well, Mike Tyson could probably give a reason...