Wednesday, April 29, 2009

John Facenda Must Be Rolling In His Grave

The Autumn Wind is no longer a pirate. It is no longer a Raider. It is a devastating nuclear wind that foreshadows a new axis of evil on the horizon. NFL fans can finally have it their way and combine their loves of football and Crocs. In the name of NFL Films, what marketing evil has the NFL wrought? The league has lost its damn mind.

Crocs are an abomination. When George Bush spoke about ridding the world of evil, he should have included Crocs along with the "terrorishts". When you think of the one thing NFL fans are missing, Crocs don't come to mind. If they do, ask someone to punch you in the larynx.

Maybe the winner on the left would rock the Crocs.

The Black Hole isn't the same with Crocs. The correction clogs with a strap don't imply malice and ill humor. They don't say pillaging just for fun. They say "I can't do clogs because I slide out of them when I look up." Roger Goodell should have presented Darrius Heywood-Bey with Raider Crocs instead of a hat and jersey at the NFL Draft. They would have symbolized the breath-taking cauldron of buffoonery that is the Oakland Raider organization. 

The NFL, Crocs and the Raiders along with every other team represented should be ashamed. The Bengals on Hard Knocks will make me feel better. The following will have to do until the premiere.

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