Thursday, January 8, 2009

Hasn't Detroit Suffered Enough?


Someone needs to put Tonya Harding out of our misery. I would consider giving one or both of Chimp's kidneys away to a Indian organ farmer if it meant sending Harding into permanent exile. The former figure skater/porn failure/boxer is forcing her way into our lives again. This time, she's jumping into the world of MMA.

Harding will be fighting in the Mixed Martial Arts Extreme Cage Fight War in Detroit on January 24. That's the shorted version of the event name which is actually the Mixed Martial Arts Extreme Cage Fight War Extravaganza Super Jamberoo Explosion Super Happy Fun Time Spectacular. The event marks the 15 year anniversary of the infamous "WHY??" incident in which skater Nancy Kerrigan was punked by Harding and her associates with a pipe to the knee.

Is it wrong to hope for a Mortal Kombat-type fatality? Hopefully she'll be matched against Brock Lesnar who will pound her into Bolivian with his ham hock hands before releasing her head into the night with a Scorpion uppercut.

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