Say it ain't so, Cleveland. Jamal Lewis is going to pack up his bags and retire at the end of the season. The bruising running back is sick of losing and he isn't going to take it anymore. He's got bigger and better things to do like build his trucking business.
"The decision I made had nothing to do with this season, how it's going or whatever. It really didn't," Lewis said. "My whole decision was based on my [trucking] business and what I have going on outside of football and things that I want to be able to give 100 percent to. I can't do that right now because I'm here. I've got to give 100 percent to this."Sheeeeit! Why didn't you say so, dawg? If you want to build your trucking business, you gotta go to the godfathers. Forget the Mafia. Nate Newton and Bam Morris are where it's at when it comes to trucking. If Lewis is smart, he'll get together with those two and create a trucking powerhouse. 200 yard games aren't anything compared to moving a couple hundred pounds of Mary Jane across state lines.
Think about it. Who knows how to make the deals? Lewis. Who knows how to transport it? Newton. Who knows how to distribute it? Morris. One stop shopping at its finest. It's a combination that can't lose. Fuck Parker Lewis.
I can see the commericals now. Toby Jones should be the spokesman.
They can get Jonah to do the music. He also does a bad ass Chop Suey. If he costs too much, a guy from DC playing some go-go beats on buckets would work too.
"Call LNM Trucking when you need to move that stinky stinky today. And you know this, man!"