Friday, August 14, 2009

The Return of the Dog Slayer

Today, the City of Brotherly Love introduced a brother who recently has been loved dearly in the joint.

And of course with the announcement that the Eagles signed Michael Vick, the Worldwide Leader went to Plaid implementing wall-to-wall coverage featuring a nationwide polling orgy and Woody Paige arguing with a life size mannequin of Michael Vick. The Leader's pundits took to the airways frothily debating the rationale of signing Mr. Vick and thereby potentially alienating their entire fanbase. (Of course, this is the same team that once had a jail in its own stadium and whose head coach has two sons, who have done more drugs than most of Philly combined. Not to mention, this is the same fanbase who cheered a potentially paralyzed Michael Irvin and pelted Santa Claus with snowballs.) So the claims of potential alienation seem to be a stretch at best.

Missing from all of this coverage, however, is how I wish the Vick signing would play out...

At the first home game of the season, out of a smokey tunnel run the Eagles led by their quarterback, Donovan McNabb.

WHEN SUDDENLY, the entire stadium goes dark and out of nowhere a pack of dogs rush the field attacking Donovan McNabb and Andy Reid. Then a single spotlight shines back onto the entrance tunnel, and we see Michael Vick and Tony Dungy standing their with arms raised...while Jim Ross exclaims....


(A boy can dream.)

1 comment:

Reverend Paul Revere said...

that is the greatest dream scenario I've ever heard.