Monday, June 23, 2008

Apparently, basketball isn't a sport

George Carlin died yesterday. 2 of the things I love are sports and cable and George Carlin figured into both in 1986 with this great bit from an HBO special on what is and what is not, a legitimate sport.



Just for review, here is a handy guide, feel free to clip it and stick it in your wallet so that you can prove to your ass captain friend who brags about his lacrosse (game) prowess that he does not, in fact, play an actual sport.

















































































Sport

Grotesque Injuries?

Played with a ball?

Not basically ping-pong?

Not only played by college douchbags?

Football

X

X

X

X

Basketball



X

X

X

Baseball

X

X

X

X

Hockey

X



X

X

Golf



X

X

X

Tennis


X


X

Lacrosse

X

X

X


Volleyball


X


X

NASCAR

X


X

X

Running



X

X

Boxing

X


X

X


Notice that basketball is NOT a sport due to the lack of groteque injuries. If someone can find me some video, we can revise that.

5 comments:

Bucktown Skins Fan said...

How about this?

Chimpanzee Rage said...

we have a winner

Loren said...

Shaun Livingston?

Fruitbat said...

I might accept the shaun livingston. that's pretty gross.

The Tomjanovich one, though, goes against one of Carlin's reasons why boxing and hockey are not sports, that they are just excuses to beat people up.

Chimpanzee Rage said...

It's college but, maybe Allan Ray?