A-Rod Gets Nothing And Probably Doesn't Like It

All-Star weekend can't end fast enough. I only made it until the 14th inning last night until I decided that sleep was more important and I realized that I didn't care who won. Nice to see Billy Wagner show consistency. Also good to see George Sherrill show up big for the O's though. Too bad the Yankees couldn't show up for A-Rod.

Page Six reports that none of A-Rod's Yankee teammates showed up for the party he was hosting at 40/40 on Monday night. Instead he was surrounded by Madonna's posse and a bunch of chickenhead groupies listening to Madonna songs. It turns out his teammates would rather hang out at home or with Mets than with him.

Sources tell the Post that A-Rod's obsession with manly women is becoming a distraction for the team.

"He's become a huge distraction with the Madonna fiasco," a source told Page Six. "It's always all about him."

Those chickenhead groupies and manly women must have warmed up at STK on Sunday. They took over the place en masse. I assume they were there waiting for Captain Morgan or the Chicago Blackhawks' Martin Havlat. Both were there in force. The former was also there in free liquid form.

The Deuce decided to make an appearance after an exhausting day at the free Breeders show in Brooklyn Sunday afternoon. The Breeders? Yes. Fat girls rocking hula hoops and string bikinis? No. Standing in the same place for five hours in the sun isn't the move either. However standing in the same place in air conditioning with an open bar is never a bad move. Famous last words.


The party itself was rather blah despite the best efforts of Captain Morgan to get the crowd hype. I just didn't believe he was that happy. I suspect he's really empty inside because he misses the sea and now has to shuck and jive for douchebags at the club. I think I'm mocking the Captain because I want to be Captain Morgan. I wanted to ask if I could sign up for duty but he was more interested in raising the roof and doing the running man.

The party was made slightly better by the David Ortiz making his run to the VIP and the efforts of girls to get past the rope man including one who tried to squeeze herself through a hole in a glass wall in an unsuccessful yet hilarious effort to get to Havlat. The number of athletes was probably equal to the number of Menounoses and Kieblers in the house.

The All-Star parade didn't get much better. Athletes waving from cars in 100 degree heat. I'd be more impressed if they rode on elephants and rhinos. Something to think about for next season.

Here are some parade shots taken of ex-players with mustaches by the Deuce's partner in crime who showed up strong All-Star Weekend.





Makes you wish you were getting swamp ass while watching the players roll by. Those of you interested in innuendo should know that Big Papi was still working Maria Menounos during the parade. Make of that what you will. Unfortunately their ride was too fast so you'll have to take our word for it.